My Cat’s Totally High (and not on catnip)

Not only does this freak me out because it looks evil, but this guy kind of resembles yours truly.

I have promised never to mention cat pee problems again, but I just have to this once. It’s funny.

This post will not be about cat pee, by the way.

One of the challenges with  administering  Prozac to my cat is how to get it in her body. There’s really only a few options. The first is to shotgun it in her mouth with a plastic syringe. This is most effective, yet most dangerous. There are all sorts of videos on how to fire a pill down a cat’s throat, and it’s usually a two person job. You can do the liquid Prozac this way, too. What happened with my cat is that within a week she started hiding from me. The only other option is transdermal gel. You rub it into the inside of her ears. There’s a lot of debate about the efficacy of this technique since the drug molecules may or may not enter the cat’s membranes due to size. READ MORE

Want a 2012 ThoughtsFromParis Holiday Card?

These children need to be taken into protective custody, stat. STAT!

It’s that time of the year – the holidays.

The end of the year where you get excited about spending time with family. Then, through old conditioning and  dysfunction your self-esteem becomes neutralized. Finally, you can’t wait to get the hell out of there. Mom can still make you crazy, and, let’s face it, you’re not exactly running around helping your folks clean up. They want you gone, too. READ MORE

I Hope This is the Last Post on Cat Pee Ever

This time I’m not going to write about my cat peeing on all sorts of stuff that isn’t kitty litter.

I’m going to explain the wreckage of past and present. The destruction left in her wake. I know wake is a noun referencing past events but let’s imagine she’s still speeding along in a cigarette boat. That way the expression works a little better. READ MORE

Going To a Dry Well

Just the thought of drinking well-water and I can taste that metal and I start shuddering.

Recently a reader asked if I had recorded the presentation I gave at AimingLow’s NonCon event this past fall.

Due to the intimacy of the room and the attendees, it really wouldn’t have made sense to video the talk. Also, it was interactive at times which wouldn’t have translated well to video. I do, however, have the presentation and thought I’d write tonight on one of the topics I discussed. READ MORE

I Made a Cat Fancy Reference in this Post

Grape Nuts or cat litter? (hint - it's not Grape Nuts)

I didn’t think I would have to write tonight as an interview I did with a UK radio station was broadcast live. I assumed it would go up on YouTube immediately after because I’m that important.

Well, just a few minutes back realized I missed not only the broadcast but that it wouldn’t magically go on Youtube seconds later. I need to write. So here I am. With nothing. READ MORE

The Real Reason You Need 30k Twitter Followers

The tweet that inspired this post. Thank you JetElway!

If you have a blog you have a Twitter account.

Earlier this month I crossed over thirty thousand Twitter followers. I’ve learned quite a bit about Twitter, having followers, and what it all means for me. And even though I shamefully bought my first few thousand friends, I earned every subsequent one fair and square. Twitter has become my main source of blog traffic according to my analytics. READ MORE

Cat Pee Tarp Purchased

I went out today to buy a cat-pee tarp.

My cat Pantaloons has a problem with inappropriate elimination. I’ve written about it on this blog at least a dozen times. Over the years I’ve tried a number of solutions including rubbing Prozac in her ears. Every so often, no matter what, she pees on my comforter or clothes left on the ground. After a lot of research online I’ve determined that this is probably just a brain glitch that can’t be corrected. If I’m wrong and one day I find a solution, awesome. READ MORE

I Discovered The Nature of God While Falling Asleep

2013 will be the Year of Teaching the Cat to Pee in the Toilet. I already have the victory celebration party venue picked out. Sadly, it will be at Olive Garden.

One of the best parts of drinking and drugs is those moments where, while inebriated, you finally “figure things out.”

Since I don’t drink or use drugs those moments come to me as I fall asleep. I’ll give you an example. Last night I was feeling some fear. No particular reason, but as I was drifting off I noticed I was scared about life in general. I was becoming less conscious by the moment, and the fear continued to intensify. This was kind of cool to notice, but also not fun. READ MORE

The Right Side Of My Bed Smells Like Cat Pee

I wish that title hadn’t been written by me.     I also wish it weren’t true.

My cat, Pantaloons, is a really awesome pet.   The day I brought her home from the shelter she didn’t show the slightest bit of fear approaching the dog.   She’s never once hissed, and her favorite thing to do is sit on your chest and lick your nose. READ MORE