I got to meet a two-time Olympic gold medalist today.
A few months back I asked Brian Goodell to come speak to my sales team about motivation and having a positive attitude. I happened to come across him and thought it would be a great fit for our group. Never having met an Olympic athlete I was beyond excited. I’ve always been moved by people that achieve excellence.
Self-soothing.
This is something I am just learning. The past three years has been a journey into the feelings I avoided over my life. Since I had associated tough feelings (anger, fear, sadness) with shame, I ran fast and away each time any of them surfaced. I thought if I felt any of those it must have been my fault and I didn’t do something “right.” And sometimes, of course, that’s true. But 90% of the time it’s just natural pain we all experienced as children. Therefore, shame resulted.
The new episode of Bloggers are Weird is live! I’m the special guest (who better?) and relay the infamous second story about my dad’s dong. You can listen…
Part II – Part I was yesterday!
We’re talking about number twos here. It’s a very simple solution. Two bathrooms, each with a locking mechanism. Also a towel under the door as to not let your doody air leave the room. Also, a high powered doody-air-sucking fan. Lastly a special peppermint scented doody-eliminating candle. Also a doody air timer. The timer is going to tell you when the air in the bathroom stops smelling like peppermint doody and just like peppermint. There you go – relationship saved.
It’s that time once every few weeks where I realize I have nothing to write about and pimp out my readers for some ideas. Here’s what you suggested
Doritos are the Skittles of the chip world. The first twenty six are delicious. The twenty seventh one will make you keel over. Hard. And when I grew up there were only two kinds, the Nacho Cheesier and the Cool Ranch. Two was enough. Sometimes you wanted tang (insert bad joke here) and sometimes you wanted cheese. They were equally good and equally destroyed your breath. Also, you can’t read eating these chips. You will destroy that leatherbound version of Moby Dick that, like me, you have on your bookshelf to impress people. So who cares I don’t know who Queequeg is? You don’t either.
You about ready for cutest thing you’ve read all day?
My friend Suzanne and I (that I’ve known since the fifth grade) pick a movie on Friday nights and then both download it. She lives in Dallas, I’m in Chicago. We watch it and send texts to each other throughout the film. I will complete your next thought – yes, right after the movie I go and shave my vagina.
A friend recently pleaded with me to change my photo here on the site.
He said it didn’t look like me and didn’t capture my silliness. Plus, he said it made me look like a bad man. He then went into detail about what kind of criminal I resembled. Without going into specifics let’s just say it wasn’t flattering.
I went on a bath bonanza for the past week.
I realized I hadn’t taken a bath in a while, and I think I was sad about something. So I took a bath. I rocked it out pretty hard in there (meaning I laid down and sat motionless for twenty minutes) and so I repeated the next day, and the day after that. I probably got four in five days.
I really screwed up.
Today as I was attending my last session at BlogWorld I went to check my flight that was later that evening. Well, technically next morning – 12:30am. It was around two in the afternoon and I wanted to see if American had an earlier flight. I was kind of in a weird place. I had already checked out of my hotel and there was the closing keynote going on at 4pm. I really wanted to see it as it was a full television show production with a live band and Chris Hardwick. However, I knew that after the show I’d cab it to the airport and sit around for six hours before my flight.
I'll never give this child another cigarette, pinky swears!
