I have been plagued by an annoying thought for the past few months.
My website simply loads too damned slow.
Partly it’s my fault – I have burdened this bitch down with tons of scripts, images, and customization. I’ve tried various solutions to decrease load time like eliminating extraneous functionality, moving my server to a cloud, combining image sprites, caching stuff, and all sorts of nerd crap. Nothing works.
When I got my place nearly seven years ago, I opted for the top floor in our building. The floor plans are essentially the same in each unit, but the fourth floor (the top) has the highest ceilings. I think they’re 13′ feet or something. Whatever – I thought it was cool.
Today I am proud to announce that at AimingLow’s very first conference (awesomely titled, Non-Conference), I will be part of the group that speaks to attendees.
If you’re a blogger, this is a must. Last year I went to BlogWorld LA – loved it. Not only did I get to hear from some of the most effective bloggers online, but I met and hung out with people who were passionate about blogging – you know, nerds. I have five close friendships today that started and blossomed there.
In the past I’ve written about how awesome it is to find white hairs on my girlfriend’s head and plucking them. I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it, I love it.
While Jessica is visiting I try to carve three minutes each day to search her extremely thick and luxurious hair for white follicles. But now I have a new obsession.
I was in the bathroom using my phone as an escape from time with my own thoughts, and I had a thought. Do any famous people follow me?
There are only two types of famous people that follow you on Twitter. Famous people that follow everyone that follows them (which is rare), and famous people that actually follow you for some weird reason.
Took the dog to the beach today. Got sunburned.
There are some people in your life that you need to disengage and bolt.
Recently a woman that I went on a few dates with a year ago asked me to help her find an apartment. Since I have dozens of leasing agents that work at my office, I offered assistance. Apparently she had started seeing some guy in her building, an artsy type that could hardly pay the bills, and they decided to move in together to save on rent. They were in love, but there were problems in the relationship. He has erection issues and also they never see each other due to their schedules. She wanted to move out, but was afraid he would be devastated and not able to take care of himself. I provided no advice other than that she trust her feelings.
I’m about to change your life.
Now, that’s a pretty bold claim. You are right to doubt. Many charlatans will separate you and your money with such proclamations!
I want nothing other than your attention. Well, actually, down the road I will want your money when I write a book, or come out with a line of crappy t-shirts and sports bras.
My girlfriend Jessica drove all the way from Atlanta to Chicago yesterday. She brought her cat and dog, who also is a chihuahua. Just in case you’re new to the site, I also have a chihuahua.
If you don’t know the story of how I met Jessica through this site, you can read that story here.
An oldie, but a goodie… and a redux to boot!
This is the true and sexy story when I saw one of my high school crushes totally naked many years after we graduated. And she hugged me. And I fell in love again.
AimingLow decided it was worth publishing. I rewrote and tightened up the screws. Unfortunately there were no screws in the actual story.
I'll never give this child another cigarette, pinky swears!
