These are posts that will go in the blog, under the slider
You about ready for cutest thing you’ve read all day?
My friend Suzanne and I (that I’ve known since the fifth grade) pick a movie on Friday nights and then both download it. She lives in Dallas, I’m in Chicago. We watch it and send texts to each other throughout the film. I will complete your next thought – yes, right after the movie I go and shave my vagina.
A friend recently pleaded with me to change my photo here on the site.
He said it didn’t look like me and didn’t capture my silliness. Plus, he said it made me look like a bad man. He then went into detail about what kind of criminal I resembled. Without going into specifics let’s just say it wasn’t flattering.
I went on a bath bonanza for the past week.
I realized I hadn’t taken a bath in a while, and I think I was sad about something. So I took a bath. I rocked it out pretty hard in there (meaning I laid down and sat motionless for twenty minutes) and so I repeated the next day, and the day after that. I probably got four in five days.
I really screwed up.
Today as I was attending my last session at BlogWorld I went to check my flight that was later that evening. Well, technically next morning – 12:30am. It was around two in the afternoon and I wanted to see if American had an earlier flight. I was kind of in a weird place. I had already checked out of my hotel and there was the closing keynote going on at 4pm. I really wanted to see it as it was a full television show production with a live band and Chris Hardwick. However, I knew that after the show I’d cab it to the airport and sit around for six hours before my flight.
Back in December I asked you foolios to send over your address and you’d get a ThoughtsFromParis holiday card. Shockingly some of you actually provided me with where you live.
By the way, to the one hot chick from Yuma that only gave me her P.O. Box, it’s been a pain in the ass hanging out at the post office waiting for you to come by. Seriously.
The newest episode of Bloggers are Weird is up on iTunes so go get it! The easiest way is to click this link, then “view in iTunes.†Then click the “subscribe†button. Also, leave me a review, sucka! If you’re a Blackberry or Zune person it’s in your store as well. For Android users just search for the feed in your favorite podcast app. Lastly, for the truly lazy I’ve ported it over onto YouTube so you can check it out below. Enjoy.
What is it about grandmas traveling together at the airport that is both amusing and touching?
I was thinking about this today as I sat in my terminal watching a group of silverbacks congregate around a garbage can. There were five of them and they appeared to be going on a vacation that required a tremendous amount of paperwork. I know old people aren’t great with technology, but my god the paperwork they were carting around was impressive. Don’t they know you’re not supposed to be that organized to go out to Palm Springs? Not trying to be ageist but I highly doubt they were going to do a fly-over in India and pick up a Sherpa before scaling the Himalayas. Drop the paperwork. Just print out your boarding pass like a normal person. Nothing more is required. You don’t need to have the Tony Orlando buffet dinner tickets for Tuesday night poking out of a manila folder in the airport.
It’s time yet again.
You know the people that pay to be my advertisers? Today we collectively shove our middle fingers up their right nostrils!
I had to choose a nostril to end that last sentence, and “right” was definitely the correct nostril. If I would have chosen “left” you could have called my sanity into question. I know this doesn’t make sense but you are silently nodding your head.
My girlfriend bought me a blue therapy light for Christmas.
I did a bunch of research on blue lights to see if they do, in fact, help to alleviate depression. Now, I don’t actually have depression. Well, not in the clinical sense. Sure I cry each morning when I awake, but that’s because the weight of the world is squarely resting on my shoulders! You know, normal thoughts. The blue light was appealing as it could help me to feel better and isn’t a destructive high.
I'll never give this child another cigarette, pinky swears!
