I Think It’s Time To Write a Book

american girl doll wedding dress
Nothing creepy about a fake baby in a wedding dress.

One of my goals for 2013 is to write a book.

This is something that brings up a lot of fear in my body. Over the past year I’ve had a few publishers reach out. Not publishers like Simon and Schuster or Random House. Smaller shops that probably just saw that I was number one for “best blogs” and figured I’d be a good revenue source.

Well, since I’m not #1 on Google anymore those conversations have dried up.

This is actually a good thing since I haven’t the foggiest about what to write, even today. Sure I can crank out 500-700 words on something benign that happened to me throughout the day, like how earlier I wanted to take a bath but our condo’s heater isn’t working right and I had forgotten and the bathtub didn’t quite get hot enough but I had already undressed and so I had to redress and it was all very depressing.

I’m like a quarter horse – good in short bursts. But a whole book? All together I’ve pumped out 214k words on this blog thus far. Most novels are around 70k words.

So, I’m thinking back to the short burst model.

Smaller books on singular topics. Like, D.J. Tackles Fishing (oh, what a glorious pun!).

Note – I’ve been fishing three times in my life and each time the hook-in-worm thing made me sad.

I’ve also had a lot of success asking you what I should write. Some of my favorite posts have been where you’ve tweeted or Facebook’ed me ideas and I’ve cranked out short essays.

Ooh.. what if I just took suggestions from Hispanics and called it Essays from Eses. I can’t be the first one to come up with that. But if so, it’s mine and you can’t have it!

One of my thoughts was to have a series called, Suggested by Bozos – Written By D.J. To my knowledge, this would be a publishing first. To write essays that you command. But, I’m not sure anyone would buy it. I suspect if the content was strong, you would.

Anyway, I have a few things to figure out. By the way, if you hadn’t already noticed I jammed my most five read stories into one format for ebook, pdf, and kindle readers. It’s on the right. Just fire off your email and you’ll receive it.

While I’ve never cared to have a book in a bookstore, I would like to have something larger than just these posts. Plus, to hit you up for $2.99 a book will help keep my American Girl addiction active. I just learned that was a real thing, by the way. I had no idea even though I’ve walked by the store on Michigan Avenue a hundred times. I’m not having a daughter because of this. I think you can command the sex by the way a woman positions herself during coitus. Need to read up.

Just like while writing a post every day of the year hasn’t made my life complete, it has encouraged me to keep pushing the pen across the notepad. Plus it gets out all the stuff that used to stay in my head. And we all know how important those musings have been. Really super important.

So, please, encourage me to get this thing done. Since I’m publishing myself I have a whole bunch of wacky ideas like A Guide To Dating D.J. – Even Though I’m Not Single, You Still Should Know This Stuff.

I love being a moron.

american girl doll wedding dress
Nothing creepy about a fake baby in a wedding dress.

photo credit: Shoshanah via photopin cc

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