These are the posts that will go in the slider.
On Tuesday my mom informed me that she was going to spend the next night at my condo. I was treating her to The Iceman Cometh here in Chicago and since the play is five hours long, she wasn’t going to drive home afterwards.
Because I didn’t want my mom to see how I really live, I went on Craigslist to find a housekeeper that could come over that evening. After sending out about ten requests, I finally got a hit.
I see a therapist once a week. And while nobody would describe me as “nuts” (Well, maybe a few people would. Like Steve. But Steve’s the one who’s nuts. You hear me Steve? You’re nuts!! Nuts!!!), I still have a number of issues. Everyone who knows me would most likely agree. I mean, I write a blog, for chrissakes. Nobody without issues writes a blog. Sorry to every other blogger who reads this. You’re included.
My girlfriend will tell you she’s my #1 fan. My friends say the same. The parents brag about how funny I am. They’re most likely being more nice than anything. And they’re not my true biggest fans.
Well, at least not anymore.
My new pal Jodie Orton from SirenFM put the interview she did with me on YouTube. You probably missed it live (as I did), so here’s your chance to check it out. I found out that she did make a few edits to the segment, and I wanted to share with you the exact conversation we had when she told me. Unlike her, I will display the conversation in full without censor. Videos down below!
Back when I went to BlogWorld I wasn’t sold on using Twitter to find new readers. I really didn’t understand what Twitter was despite having used it for over two years. I had a smattering of followers and no idea how to get more. Ironic because I was attending the largest social media event of the year.
I imagine every woman has one of these stories.
This morning, my girlfriend received a text message from a guy she went out with a few times over a year ago. They haven’t spoken since, and I don’t think he even lives in the same state.
The message was something like, “I know I’m not supposed to say this, but I really want to XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.” And I’m not bleeping it out because it’s suggestive. I’m bleeping it out because it’s crazy graphic. It was very specific. Oddly specific.
Every year I do exactly one charitable thing.
On May 5th I’ll be walking (I think it’s two miles) with my dog, Lil’ Miss Meepers, and a few thousand other dogs and owners for Anti-Cruelty. It’s called Bark in the Park, and it goes to support the largest no-kill animal shelter in Illinois.
I’m introducing a new and SO INSANELY EXCITING feature on my blog that you might literally have a coronary reading the very next sentence.
I have installed a timer to display the number of days, hours, and minutes since the last time my cat Pantaloons peed on the bed where I sleep. Right on this very blog.
I'll never give this child another cigarette, pinky swears!
