It’s Friday night and I’m nearly passed out after many Papa John’s slices.  Eating pizza is a great way to ensure a heavy sleep.  However, I had forgotten to write my post.  My bedroom now smells like farts by the way.  One of the other benefits of pizza.

As you know, in January I committed to writing every day.  Even though I thought this impossible, I made it.  Then I just kept going.  Here I am in August some 200k words later.

While writing every day this year would have been an unreasonable goal back in January, I focused on just a week at a time.  The twelve steppers do it one day at a time, but I like to aim higher.  I figure I can do anything for a week – even cleaning the cat box each night.

It’s time to start improving.

While my hair and sense of humor are already perfect, other parts are not.  This time around I thought I would do it the fun way.

How?  By setting weekly challenges of stuff that I need to do.

Some of these will be daily activities like flossing and bagging up dog poop outside (both of which I NEVER do).  Others will be just one task that may take all week, like picking up the phone to call Grandma or cleaning my bedroom sheets and towels.

By the way, and I think I’ve written about this before, but if you’re not using bed suspenders you simply aren’t living.  Google the shit.

But as it has always made sense to spend ten minutes each night cleaning the condo, I never do it.  I lack the discipline, and it doesn’t help that I have a deep-seeded belief that mops look better on chicks.

I bet you have little things too that you could commit to doing in a week.  You know, like fixing that leaky gutter or helping your kid do his algebra, or just going to bed without makeup on.

So, here’s what we going to do.  Each Sunday night while we’re entwined in a spiral of shame about where our lives are currently at, we’re going to set a goal for the week.  I don’t care if your goal is to find Jesus or finally have that affair with the encyclopedia salesman. Just pick something and we’ll do it together.

Each Sunday we’ll check in and set a new one.  If nobody wants to do it I’ll simply pray that an avalanche covers your village.

So, to make this easy (watch to see me go meta here), we’re just going to set ONE goal.  To set one goal this Sunday.  A goal to set a goal!

Start thinking – I know what I’m going to do.  It involves learning the Alec Baldwin monologue in GlenGarry Glen Ross.  How will this improve my life?  How will it not?

I wish someone would write me a monologue for the movie they adapted from their own award-winning play.

Tagged as: humor, ONE