TheNumbers, our band, is performing live tomorrow night here in Chicago. Just in case you happen to be local, we’re playing at Silvie’s in Lakeview and go on at 10:30pm.
For the rest of you who don’t give a shit, please keep reading.
We have learned that a producer will be in attendance to watch our performance. Apparently she has her own studio and just finished an album for a pretty big blues singer. I was told the name but don’t remember – let’s call him Lefty Jenkins. That sounds about right.
So we rehearsed tonight to try to tighten up our songs, arrangements and vocals.
I have no stage presence. I stand and don’t move for the whole set. Part of that is because I have a lot of background vocals to do and need to be near the mic. Also, we try to play very precisely, so jumping around and slamming the fretboard with my pick would screw up the songs.
I’ve learned from playing live that the loudest bands are usually the shittiest. There’s a lot of overcompensation for bad songwriting in playing and singing loud. Now, if you’re Mastadon, feel free to sing and play loud – you’ve made it. But if you’re a local band and your songs are crappy, then yeah, play loud.
Also, we don’t all wear sunglasses on stage, dress any differently that we do lounging around the house, or point at the audience and wink. We don’t even talk between songs except to say, “Thank you.” Which I’m happy about because nothing is worse than being in a band with some douche who tries to rile the crowd in between songs.
Then there’s the issue of eye contact. Where am I supposed to look? I have absolutely no idea, even after playing a lot of shows over the years. The easy move is to stare at the fretboard. But that bores the audience and disconnects them.
The other move is to look directly into somebody’s eyes. But that’s potentially creepy. And since I don’t like staring at men, I pick a woman. After two seconds I look away. I don’t want to freak her out. However, I have to look somewhere.
What I do is stare six inches above everyone’s head. I’m not sure how it reads from the audience. People aren’t checking me out anyway. They’re talking with their friends, drinking beers, and checking their smartphones.
But hopefully they’re listening.