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I Scored A Turkey Breast!

I have an AWESOME food tip for you.

You know those rotisserie chickens you can get pre-cooked from the grocery store?  I love those things and probably average one a week.  I heat up a little brown rice and vegetables and combine it all in a bowl like pig feed.  I know this sounds healthy, and it is, but it’s only once a week.  The rest of the time it’s fozen pizzas and graham cracker Double Stuf Oreos.

By the way, once I’m done with a rotisserie chicken and only the carcass remains, I stuff that fucker into my garbage disposal and flip it on.  I get some bizarre feeling of power from doing this and I thoroughly enjoy it.

Hold your comments on how it’s not good to stuff an entire chicken skeleton into the garbage disposal.  First, I don’t care.  Second, I’ve been doing this for over eight years in my condo and nary a problem has arisen.

Here’s the food tip – instead of picking up the chicken, get a roasted turkey breast.  Most grocers don’t carry them, and you may have to call around.  Even at the big chain that does them here in Chicago, only a few of the stores regularly have them.  Turkey breasts are more expensive than the chicken  – about $11 or so, but totally worth it.  You get more than twice the meat, and it’s the healthy parts.  Plus, turkey tastes better than chicken, and unless it’s Thanksgiving you don’t get the real stuff very often.

Okay, it doesn't look awesome. But it is.

So today, my big accomplishment was to locate a cooked turkey breast.  I called around and found a store that had two.  Normally they won’t hold them for you, because, let’s face it, the deli counter women have better stuff to do.  They’re busy with all that weird pre-made potato salad crap that I can’t believe anybody buys.

But today, for the first time, someone held one for me.  I was pretty excited.  Cooked up the brown rice (currently out of vegetables) and combined it for a nice 4pm lunch.  Then, since our band played last night and I didn’t get home until about 2am, I passed out after this turkey feast.  Woke up around 8pm.

It’s now 11pm, and I probably shouldn’t eat turkey this late, but I know I will.  Oh yes.

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