One of the questions I am asked regularly is…
Do you still talk with your ex-wife?
The answer is yes.
Since I’m in a ridiculous number of support groups and therapy, I’ve had a year point five to process a lot of the anger and sadness that comes with divorce. Sure it still pops up once in awhile, and I feel like crying (sometimes I do) or screaming choice expletives at an invisible version of her (I do this too). That’s normal, from what I’m told.
My mind is always on humor mode. During the day, I probably work up 10-20 one-liners or ideas for stories. I have been doing that ever since I was little. I’m wired up to find the funny. Not sure if you would agree I always find it, but, screw you! You dress like a bozo and we all laugh at you.
Many jokes get rejected (probably 60%) before they ever make their way onto my Twitter feed or this blog.
For example yesterday I thought:
I wish I had come up with the “Coexist” bumper sticker, if for no other reason than to make a shitload of money exploiting intolerance.
Somewhat clever, but not particularly funny. Rejected. (and yes, I understand the incongruence of posting it here)
Much of my humor comes from writing songs and jokes about my cat and dog, and my ex-wife’s two cats, one of which lived with me for four years. Her other cat, Shitty Kitty (yes, that’s the real name), I haven’t met, but only has one eye for some reason or another. I think my ex-wife performed the surgery.
A one-eyed cat inherently contains a wealth of joking-around material.
Just yesterday I texted my ex-wife:
Are you familiar with Shitty’s favorite restaurant? Argggh-by’s!
Then to continue the pirate theme:
Do you know who Shitty Kitty’s natural enemies are? Scurvy dogs!
I’m particularly proud of that one.
She texted back her own joke. It was horribly racist, so I won’t repeat it. Take that Albanians!
(Obviously she did not text back something racist. She’s very tolerant. Even has a “Coexist” bumper sticker on her Prius.)
Now, my ex-wife and I don’t really ever speak on the phone. Sure, once in awhile when I a vet question or to sing a song I wrote about the dog. We don’t have long meaningful conversations as it wouldn’t be appropriate. We’re both moving on.
But what am I supposed to do – not text or call a joke over? Let it go to waste?
So, is it healthy? I don’t know. I just like making people laugh. Even people that leave.