Why?
Some bozo bought the stained-green-used-dental-Xray-vest out from under me. Yes, the stained-green-used-dental-Xray-vest that was once owned and operated by Dr. Wang and still bared his name in cursive.
I wasn’t paying attention to the bidding, and I guess I just never thought somebody’s self esteem would be low enough to buy this. Other than me.
Think of how bad you must feel about yourself to purchase this piece. I wanted it half to get the good rush of a heavy vest while laying down, but also half to use as material for future blog posts. It would have been hilarious. I’m guessing the person that bought this was for real.
Are they an amateur dentist? Playing in one of those paintball tournaments? Involved with a street tackle football league?
I was buying it for a goof and to have something heavy push on me. Is their reason more sinister than that?
I’m good and mad at myself (note: need to say “good and mad” more often) for letting someone make off with my vest. Better this way I suppose. I suspect there’s a good amount of cancer trapped in the lead of that vest. My understanding is that lead traps cancer.
So, my next step? Save up for the big one. The big one, D.J.? You betcha.
A 20lb weighted blanket. These can go for up to $300. Which is a lot of dough to cough up unseen considering you can’t go down to the local IKEA and try it out first.
You know what’s weird about IKEA? That you can have a disgusting Swedish lunch while on your shopping spree to buy a lampshade that is mildy trendy but does not exceed $8. You shouldn’t really need to gnosh on salmon during this buy.
It’s a tough decision because if I don’t like the weighted blanket, I can’t imagine it would be easy to unload on Craigslist. Nobody wants to buy someone else’s heavy linens unless I run into a serious autistic bargain hunter.
My girlfriend’s flying in this weekend – perhaps this could be a early birthday present? Dare to dream. Dare to dream.