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Paris-Ochial – You Watched What? In High School?

If you’re not familiar with my series “Paris-Ochial,” these are tales of my time at a Catholic high school as a Protestant.

Read Part I Here

Recently I was turned on to a great NPR podcast.   It’s called On  Being with Krista Trippett, and, not unlike all the other awesomeness that is NPR, it’s a deeper discussion into such things like race, social reform, and anything else that matters.

In one episode, Krista was interviewing Frances Kissling, who was once the President of Catholics for a Free Choice.  She has very specific views on abortion, and no matter which side of the aisle you land on this issue, her eloquence and likability are undeniable.

As I was listening to this interview, I triggered back to a time when I faced abortion personally.

No, I did not get a girl pregnant.

No, my sister did not date the football team.

And no, I didn’t intern at Planned Parenthood.

My personal struggle with abortion goes back to junior year of high school.

You Watched What? In High School?

 

Remember Channel One?  You probably do.

The Most Boring Logo In History

Channel One is a network  that developed in the late eighties to provide schools with televisions free of charge.  Each day there were twelve minutes of programming focused around current events and world news.  The catch?  You had to sit through two minutes of commercials, which was usually Jay Leno hawking Doritos.

Thanks for getting me hooked on Cool Ranch in ninth grade, Jay.

There were always a few kids who had weirdo parents who did not want them watching Channel One in school.  Which was strange to me as I learned a lot more from Mr. Wizard than any science teacher I ever had.  School is hard enough, and to be the one in your class who has to go to the library for twelve minutes each day is just bad parenting.

Let’s switch gears back to abortion.  Ugh.  A topic I never want to discuss for any reason.  My belief is to leave this issue up to the ladies.  Fellas, step back.  Don’t open your mouth on this one.  Trust me.

Junior year we took a class called Morality.  I can’t tell you one thing about it except this – my teacher decided it was totally cool to show us a video of a woman getting an abortion.

The video is called  The Silent Scream, and for years I swore it was narrated by Leonard Nimoy.  This, I have found, is absolutely not true.  Maybe the narrator just sounded like Leonard Nimoy.  So, my apologies to Mr. Nimoy, as I’ve sullied his good name at least a dozen times since high school in the retelling of this story.  Sorry, Spock.  Feel free to give me the Vulcan neck pinch  if we ever cross paths.

It is logical to not speak your mind about abortion, men.

The premise of this movie shows an actual filmed abortion at eleven weeks.  The title comes from a moment in the video where you can hear a high-pitched noise and it is suggested that this is the baby crying out.

I know that last one was hard to read.  It was hard to type.  Stay with me.

This video has been criticized by physicians and  determined that there is no logical way an eleven week fetus can feel pain or make noise.  But to my eleventh grade mind, I bought it.  We all did.

I remember during the video some people had to leave the room, others gasped and nearly fainted.  I, myself, had to turn and face the wall.  I would not make a good physician.  Well, that and there’s no possible way I could pass the MCAT.  Organic chemistry?  Are you kidding me?

Okay, we’re through the rough patch.  Here’s the interesting part of the story, and the reason I’m telling it.

My school used the Channel One News television to run the video.

No, I’m not joshing you.

And I’m pretty sure our administration didn’t have a conversation with Channel One News   prior.

Scene

Is this Channel One?

Yes, how do you like the programming?

Oh, man, it’s awesome.  Thanks for all the free televisions!

No prob.  What’s up?

Hey, before I get started, that news anchor you guys have, Anderson Cooper?  He’s destined for stardom, that one!

Yeah?  I’ll pass it on.  Nice guy.

Anywho, we’d like permission to show a video on the Channel One television for one of our classes.

Hmm – what’s the show you’re going to air?  A My Two Dads episode?

Not quite.  You remember Star Trek?

Fin

The good news is that the next year we watched JFK, which was easier to handle.  Although, now that I think about it, that movie is incredibly gruesome, too.  What was going on with my high school?

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