Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the amp domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_has_paired_endpoint was called incorrectly. Function cannot be called before services are registered. The service ID "paired_routing" is not recognized and cannot be retrieved. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.1.1.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_is_available was called incorrectly. `amp_is_available()` (or `amp_is_request()`, formerly `is_amp_endpoint()`) was called too early and so it will not work properly. WordPress is not currently doing any hook. Calling this function before the `wp` action means it will not have access to `WP_Query` and the queried object to determine if it is an AMP response, thus neither the `amp_skip_post()` filter nor the AMP enabled toggle will be considered. The function was called too early (before the plugins_loaded action) to determine the plugin source. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.0.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_has_paired_endpoint was called incorrectly. Function cannot be called before services are registered. The service ID "paired_routing" is not recognized and cannot be retrieved. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.1.1.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_is_available was called incorrectly. `amp_is_available()` (or `amp_is_request()`, formerly `is_amp_endpoint()`) was called too early and so it will not work properly. WordPress is not currently doing any hook. Calling this function before the `wp` action means it will not have access to `WP_Query` and the queried object to determine if it is an AMP response, thus neither the `amp_skip_post()` filter nor the AMP enabled toggle will be considered. The function was called too early (before the plugins_loaded action) to determine the plugin source. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.0.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the google-document-embedder domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_is_available was called incorrectly. `amp_is_available()` (or `amp_is_request()`, formerly `is_amp_endpoint()`) was called too early and so it will not work properly. WordPress is currently doing the `plugins_loaded` hook. Calling this function before the `wp` action means it will not have access to `WP_Query` and the queried object to determine if it is an AMP response, thus neither the `amp_skip_post()` filter nor the AMP enabled toggle will be considered. It appears the plugin with slug `google-analytics-for-wordpress` is responsible; please contact the author. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.0.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the wild-book-child domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_is_available was called incorrectly. `amp_is_available()` (or `amp_is_request()`, formerly `is_amp_endpoint()`) was called too early and so it will not work properly. WordPress is currently doing the `plugins_loaded` hook. Calling this function before the `wp` action means it will not have access to `WP_Query` and the queried object to determine if it is an AMP response, thus neither the `amp_skip_post()` filter nor the AMP enabled toggle will be considered. It appears the plugin with slug `google-analytics-for-wordpress` is responsible; please contact the author. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.0.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function _load_textdomain_just_in_time was called incorrectly. Translation loading for the rocket domain was triggered too early. This is usually an indicator for some code in the plugin or theme running too early. Translations should be loaded at the init action or later. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 6.7.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Notice: Function amp_is_available was called incorrectly. `amp_is_available()` (or `amp_is_request()`, formerly `is_amp_endpoint()`) was called too early and so it will not work properly. WordPress is currently doing the `init` hook. Calling this function before the `wp` action means it will not have access to `WP_Query` and the queried object to determine if it is an AMP response, thus neither the `amp_skip_post()` filter nor the AMP enabled toggle will be considered. It appears the plugin with slug `google-analytics-for-wordpress` is responsible; please contact the author. Please see Debugging in WordPress for more information. (This message was added in version 2.0.0.) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/functions.php on line 6121

Warning: file_exists(): open_basedir restriction in effect. File(core/post-comments) is not within the allowed path(s): (/home/tfphumorblog/:/tmp/:/var/tmp/:/opt/alt/php74/usr/share/pear/:/dev/urandom:/usr/local/php74/lib/:/usr/local/php74/lib/:/usr/local/php81/lib/:/usr/local/php56/lib/:/usr/local/lib/php/) in /home/tfphumorblog/domains/thoughtsfromparis.com/public_html/wp-includes/blocks.php on line 764
My Race Car Driving Youth • Thoughts From Paris · Humor Blog of D.J. Paris · Funny Stories
Site icon Thoughts From Paris · Humor Blog of D.J. Paris · Funny Stories

My Race Car Driving Youth

At the wedding I was at this weekend, the groom handed me an envelope which contained an important piece of my youth.

This was my official race car driving license.  I hadn’t seen it since 1993 when I lost it in a card game called Suicide Guts to the groom.  I had forgotten about this part of my life, as I was only thirteen and those were some dark times.

Being a race car driver is nothing but stress.  Lots of turns.  That accelerator pedal.  Oh, and the brake pedal!  I almost forgot about the fucking brake pedal!

Not much more to say.  I drove.  I went around a track.  Multiple times.  This proves it.

Those bangs. They... Ugh...
Exit mobile version