I went on a photowalk with the great Neil Kramer today.
Here at the AimingLow NonCon we headed over to a butterfly sanctuary in Callaway Gardens. There were about twenty of us.
Inside the conservatory was lush vegetation. Trees, flowers, and plants lined the glass walls. Sunlight focused in and the air was humid. The purpose of this trip was to learn how to better take photos using only your phone. After some instruction from Neil we went off on our own.
I’m not a big photography person. I don’t own an SLR and my 8mp phone cam meets my basic needs. I only take photos of friends and family. The only true camera technique I know is to hold it above the subjects’ head and point down to avoid recording a double chin. If you’re not doing this you’re screwing over even your skinny friends.
The first few minutes of the tour, I walked around locating butterflies. The idea is capture butterflies with their wings spread. This is not simple nor easy. I’d follow a butterfly for many seconds until it rested on a flower. Butterflies start slowing down their wing flapping to achieve balance and then close the wings. You have a few seconds to try to catch them before they close up shop and you just see the outside of their wings.
A few of the wins…
Okay. Butterflies. You get it.
You know what you really want, however, when you go to a butterfly sanctuary? The ONLY thing you really want?
YOU WANT THE BUTTERFLIES TO LAND ON YOU.
I noticed several different techniques that people employed to get this to happen. Some chased the butterflies hoping to attract them with movement. Others snuck up on a butterfly hoping to get so close that they would jump onto their blouse from a flower. The most common action was to stand perfectly still and hope that a butterfly decides your rigidity equals the place to be.
Watching grownups (and myself) devolve into children hoping that we’re “special” enough to have a butterfly land on us was entertaining. I would have actually been jealous of someone had a butterfly landed on them. Nobody had that luck, however.
I walked away mildly dejected. My suspicion is that we all did. Nobody would say such a thing as it’s too embarrassing. But we all wanted to have a one butterfly on our shoulder and another at the end of our index finger.
It’s true. We can admit it.
I want control over animals (and butterflies). Each time I call my cat over I have a 50/50 chance she’s going to follow instruction. Half the time I’m sad/angry when the cat ignores me and heads into another room. But when she jumps up on my chest… OMIGOD I TOTALLY MADE THAT HAPPEN!
The desire for control over animal behavior, for me, is about validating my goodness. I see dogs, cats, butterflies as pure and therefore only influenced by goodness. Therefore, when my cat decides to go look out the window instead of sitting on my chest, she’s rejecting me. When the butterfly flies past me and lands on a flower a few feet away… Well, if I had been a little more awesome it wouldn’t have been able NOT to land on me!
I just want everything to validate me. That shouldn’t be so hard, right?
KareDiane says:
While the potential butterfly validation may be uplifting, consider those of us who fear the butterfly landing. There is a Butterfly House on Mackinac Island. I could not bring myself to enter it. I have a phobia of fluttery things coming close to me, especially my face. Run! Run Away!!!! *throws arm over face*
jesintheworld says:
KareDiane I have been made fun of all summer by my horseback riding buddies for being afraid of butterflies. They said I was alone, and now I know my flutter-phobia is not unique to me! I feel tons better! I scared my horse, to everyone else’s amusement, screaming at a butterfly landing on my shoulder. This post was borderline terrifying. 🙂
KareDiane says:
jesintheworld KareDiane 😉 Far from alone!
D.J. Paris says:
jesintheworld KareDiane You too need to start a support group called “We’re Really Bored So We Make Up Phobias” – at least you’ll have each other!
D.J. Paris says:
KareDiane Okay, but since there’s no way for them to hurt you, this one is about you being nuts. Man up and get thyself to the Butterfly House. You will not die and the world will not collapse. I promise.
brigidday says:
I can make your dreams come true for $9. Check out the Peggy Notebaert Nature Museum in Lincoln Park. They have a butterfly release every day where they let hundreds of butterflies go inside the sanctuary. You’re bound to have one land on you.
Well, unless there’s something really, really wrong with you, but that’s between you and the butterflies. I can lead you to the mecca, you just have to be worthy. (Oh, and wearing bright colors helps.)
D.J. Paris says:
brigidday Been there many times. They do land on you there! I’m only a few miles away so I’ll head over there every few years. Great call!
Ginger Kay says:
There is a butterfly garden near me. If you take children, there can be tears shed about butterflies not landing on them. It is that important.
D.J. Paris says:
Ginger Kay I KNOW. There should be a sign that says “Butterflies will probably not land on you because they’ve been trained by our staff to leave guests alone. It’s not personal and they love you just the same.”
_Mediocrates says:
@tfpHumorBlog Watched my cat frolic through butterflies yesterday and then methodically stalk, kill and eat one. I made her come inside.
D.J. Paris says:
_Mediocrates I saw mine stalk and kill a housefly recently. It was funny. Butterfly would make me sad. Ha.
Katjaneway says:
I had a hummingbird attempt to get nectar out of my ear once. omg you have no idea what that felt like. I was just walking in the yard and all of a sudden: intensely loud buzzing. And I felt something close to my ear. And I freaked, and saw the hummingbird fly away. I was like DUDE; that just happened. lol
D.J. Paris says:
Katjaneway Hilarious. Probably a good idea to q-tip out the ear cheese every now and then.
lcarilo says:
Caterpillars & Butterflies were my fascination and distraction as a wee tiny girl being taught to read comic strips, embroider and crochet in a magical garden between ages three to five… love them to this very day.
D.J. Paris says:
lcarilo I grew up in Peoria so I only associate them with the big company that employees the whole town. I feel like for every butterfly I saw growing up I saw 25 moths. Horrible ratio.
knightndaze says:
Ha! That’s why there are so many “dog people” in the world. They just want the validation, no questions asked. “Cat people” want to earn the validation. “fish people” are just weird.
Katjaneway says:
Lol that’s so true! Except for the fish people. I’m kind of a fish person. It’s mezmerizing to watch fish swim. I own a cat not really because I want to earn any validation (I get rejected more often than my hubby. Stoopid hubby) but because I’m lazy and cats can take care of themselves. So much better than dogs! 😛
D.J. Paris says:
Katjaneway I am a fish person and they’re really not that weird. Just nerds.
D.J. Paris says:
knightndaze I have a 55 gallon reef tank. So thanks. Funny enough, no joke, tonight I put it up on Craigslist. I’ve had reef fish and corals for many years and it’s just all too much. A cat and a dog are plenty for me right now.