It’s been at least a week since I grossed you out. “Too long!” some may shout. “Not long enough!” others will cry.
I, myself, subscribe to the “Too long!” camp.
My dog, who just turned four is seven pounds. I live on the top floor (4) of my condo building, and there is no elevator. When my ex-wife and I got the dog we bought a PetLoo. Nowadays there are many copycat products, but the original was developed by an Aussie woman.
I have a large back deck that opens from the kitchen. Quickly we trained the dog to go out and do her ones and twosies on the PetLoo. There are little holes in the astroturf that allows urine to flow through and into a cup. For plops, you just have to grab them off the top.
It’s recommended each day to run hot water over the fake-grass as this will keep the urine from binding to the astroturf. But seriously, who is going to do that? Not this guy. I don’t even pick up her poop if we go for a walk. I mean, I probably have picked up poop about twelve times total. In four years.
Once a year I have to buy a new thing of grass. It’s like $60 and it’s a must. The stench is so bad you can smell it from six feet away on any day should the wind pick up.
In between new grass purchases, I remember to clean it a few times. Tonight was one of those times.
What I do is clear everything out of the dishwasher and load up the PetLoo, face-down on the top rack. I put a large amount of soap and flip it on. Within five minutes the jets are doing the heavy lifting.
When I first bought this I asked the company if the dishwasher was a good idea. They told me it would ruin the fake grass. This turned out not to be true. What was true, and what they didn’t tell me was that the kitchen would smell like a public beach bathroom. If you’re into piss, you’ll love it.
At the end of the forty-five minute cycle it’s like the National Asparagus Growers Council is partying in my kitchen. But imagine they’re hanging out in a sauna at the time. Hot dog peeps is what comes and punches you in the face when you open the dishwasher door.
I then run it through again. Once done, I pull it out (still reeks of the yella) and put it back on the Pet Loo. I then run a third full cycle totally empty with a lot of soap. After that, the dishwasher is ready for primetime. The smell is gone and in goes the silverware and plates.
So, to recap – I wash the dog bathroom in the dishwasher two consecutive cycles. Then I run it a third time empty. Maybe that’s a water waster. I don’t know. I don’t seem to care.
The photo below was just taken. I had to fold one half of it up so you could see. It covers the whole entire top area.
CarrieSieffert says:
I am disturbed on so many levels – but I’ll stick with just two.One: You don’t pick up your dogs poop!? Nasty. I hate it when my kids are running down the road and I have to scream for them to dodge crap. Toddlers are not too steady on their feet. I am not an impressed person when I have to clean shit off their shoes or body after a nose dive into some waywards dog owners animal feces. (Although granted, before I had kids I never cleaned up after my dogs either)
Two: Ew. The dishwasher….What about walking your dog more often?
In any case…I still love you. Kinda.
seasidewriter says:
Though I laughed like a hyena, I have to confess, karynapyle vomited a little bit in my mouth. I feel really bad for whomever buys or rents your apartment after you leave. They’ll be washing their dishes in dog piss and wont even know it. I hope your dog is at least super-cute…
pdk117 says:
I think what your have done is perfectly fine. I maybe would have run it under the hot water in the tub or faucet first but the hot water in the dishwasher is killing any bacteria that was in the urine. Great idea. Paul @pdk117
Craziness Abounds says:
You are right! That did gross me out! haha. Way to go I guess. (No pun intended!) This would NOT work for me as I have a 170 pound St Bernard and a 100 pound Golden Retriever. I know she’s fat. Workin on it.
Sonja Rois says:
I don’t have an issue with cleaning it in the dishwasher, but I feel bad for your puppy. (I know, at 4 years it’s not a puppy anymore, but you have one of those dogs that never REALLY grows up.) The reason I feel bad is if your aren’t cleaning it that often and it smells to you, I can only imagine how bad it smells to your dog since his/her sense of smell is way better than yours. Personally, I don’t want to go potty in a bathroom that smells, but since that’s where you go to do your business…
Ok this is starting to sound a bit too animal-lovery and preachy so I’ll leave you with this…You like that word I just made up? Lovery. It’s the next big “it” word. lol
elleroy5 says:
I have one word for your dinner guests: Chinette.
hlsblue says:
Hilarious! As someone who also washes inappropriate items in the dishwasher I find this refreshing, just as the grass does.
Killian says:
I am so, so very glad I wasn’t eating anything at the time that I read this missive; made it that slightly easier to prevent the yarfing.
I realize that the heat and chemical cleaners involved in a dishwasher are designed to sanitize, and so therefore, it’s most likely fine. But the mental image skeeves me out to no end.
But just think – now that people know that you do this, you may well have a lot fewer people interested in eating at your place!
naserbeam says:
DiabeteSimple rinse off in the shower (especially if you have movable shower head) and a bit of Mr. Clean is all you need to get rid of odor and have it clean without the hot piss bleach smell… at least it worked with my diabetic (pee-o-rama) cat’s litterbox.
naserbeam says:
Sorry had an evil phone demon that wouldn’t give me a cursor nor the scroll up function… should read “Simple, rinse…”
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