Tag: lesson

I Reviewed Bic For Her Pens on InThePowderRoom

Sometimes I have to let an idea incubate.

Every month I pen a short piece for InThePowderRoom, probably the greatest humor blog on the web. Or, more accurately, the greatest humor blog on the web that has asked me to contribute. And every month, the head editor Sarah reminds me a week before my deadline. The column is titled “What Does He Think?” and involves reviewing products designed for women, but from a male perspective. And since I’m not a broad, each month I freak out because I don’t know much about women’s products. Obviously I’m up on all the latest lip plumper glosses (who isn’t?), but I can’t write about that every month. I’m a professional, dammit! READ MORE

I Wrote What YOU Told Me – Part VIII

Every so often I realize that my creativity appears to be slumbering. It is in those moments that I reach out to readers who remind me that their ideas for blog posts are much worse than my own. Here we go.

I actually have a cat vomit story from when I was wee. Goddamn do I love alliteration! Anyway, I was forced to take piano lessons from an old bat named Mrs. Mayhew. My sister and I alternated which meant that for her 30 minutes I would keep myself busy by looking around Mrs. Mayhew’s home. She had, like all old people, a shitload of National Geographic magazines. I found one of the floor which had what appeared to be a 3D volcano on the cover. It was a huge mound of brown hardened glop. Impressed I thought, “Man, this magazine really does some cool stuff!” I reached over the top of the volcano and touched the inside. Smushy. When it was my turn for the lesson I told Mrs. Mayhew how I found the issue with the model volcano on the cover. She looked puzzled, went over to where I was playing and gasped. Yep, the cat had barfed on the magazine cover. Right next to the cover story – on volcanos. READ MORE

I Tried to Outsmart a Tony Robbins Firewalk

I really thought I could outsmart a firepit.

For the past four days I’ve been at a Tony Robbins seminar in the suburbs of Chicago. Over five thousand people have come in from eighteen countries to listen to the man with the huge hands help them help themselves. During the past few days I’ve cheered, yelled, screamed to the heavens, cried, and danced to over fifty songs. I’ve hugged well over a hundred strangers and given group massages to participants. When I leave to go to the bathroom I instinctively high-five people coming out of the bathroom. This would not be well-received in polite society. But, hey, this is Tony Robbins. It’s the culture of the event. You drink the Kool-Aid. READ MORE

I Almost Ate One of Your Kidney Stones

Kidney Stones - the world's most disappointing rock candy lookalike.

One of my most dedicated readers and fellow bloggers passed a kidney stone today.

When I asked her to describe the pain (or lack of) she wrote, “It was like someone stabbed me in the back and then spun me around on the blade for six hours.” (Hyperbole much, Nicole?) If anything she’s more apt to make a joke of something that tell you how painful it really feels. She was even the hospital for a full day because it was serious. READ MORE

One Month To Go – Don’t Screw It Up!

Maybe I'll devote December's posts to all the cool stuff that goes on in Thailand. Sure, this baby was eaten, but was eaten in a damned awesome way.

Back in January I promised to write every day that month. Then I just kept going.

Now, I’m in the home stretch with one month to go. I’ve gone without a miss and I’m proud of the work that’s been published. I would have never thought that I would have something to say every day of the year but I guess I did. Not every post was a winner – there’s a probably a dozen or two that I’d like removed. The bad hair days of writing, if you will. READ MORE