The Legend of Poodle Businessman

chihuahua godzilla

Last year for Halloween I dressed as a middle finger. And even though that amazing costume got big laughs, much like a woman invited to three weddings in the same year, I was determined not to wear the same outfit twice. I …

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I Got Stupid on Stupid Ass Questions

stupid ass questions dj paris

The fine people at StupidAssQuestions asked me to respond to stupid ass questions. I think they wanted me to choose just one from the bunch they sent, but I answered everything. They were so taken with my wit that they …

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Low Self-Esteem is Pretty Great, Actually!

Low Self Esteem

Nobody ever talks about the advantage of low self-esteem. The best part of thinking that you’re a piece of subhuman garbage is that you learn how to obtain validation from others. Sure, it’ll land you in therapy after twenty or …

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The ThoughtsFromParis 2014 Holiday Card

thoughts from paris holiday card 2014

Every year I find holiday cards both exciting and disappointing. First, it’s validating to know that someone to the time to write out my address. I’m bummed that most only send picture cards without messages. Reading somebody’s handwriting feels …

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What the Hell, Let’s Get Back to It

ren faire

It’s amazing how quickly I lost the willingness  to write. In 2012 I challenged myself to write every day for a  year. The first month was trying but after that I became proficient. My mind started searching during the day …

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Fun With Yahoo Answers

dumb girl

I needed a new distraction. God forbid I actually sit down and improve my skills as a serious writer. That would be worthwhile and intelligent. For some reason this year I’ve had the hardest time getting motivated to do much. …

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