The Paris Sleep Chronicles

I’m crazy sick.  This is the first time in over two years that I have a cold.  As such, I’ve been jacked up on anything that ends in the word “ephedrine” for two days straight.

I thought this morning, “Well, since I’m nearly hallucinating from this cold, it would probably be healthy to bicycle to work ten miles each way.”  Not my best call.  But who knows, maybe it was healthy.

So, I’m a little off right now.  Brain is foggy.  But I owe you a post.  That’s how committed I am.  Shower me with gratitude, like those dumb lists Oprah has you make each morning.

This past Friday I was at home to celebrate Mother’s Day.  My mom and I ended up in the family room, she on her iPad, me on the laptop.  We were both getting tired.  All of a sudden I looked over and saw this…

Not only was she sleeping, mouth agape, but also making tiny snores.  I stared at her for a good five minutes.  Every few minutes she’d choke on a breath, sort of wake up, and then right back to sleep seconds later.

I snapped the photo and immediately posted it to Facebook.

Now, this was late in the evening.  I turned off the lights and headed upstairs to go to bed.

The next morning I received a bunch of text messages and emails.  Apparently my mom captured this in the early dawn.  Also posted to Facebook.

Somebody must have alerted her to the Facebook photo, and she had exacted revenge.  I’m amazed that I have my arms behind my head like a moron, and my legs up in the air.  It looks like I’m ready to do power crunches and blast my upper abdominals.  Except I was actually dreaming of dancing in a meadow betwixt the lilacs.

Note – I’ve never dreamt of dancing in a meadow betwixt the lilacs.

Also, my mouth is wide open, just like hers.

I got nothing else tonight, guys.  I’m about ready to pass out.  If you’d like to say a rosary for my cold, this will earn you an indulgence, or so I understand.  Hop to it!