Tony Robbins + D.J. Paris = Well, Something

tony robbins family guy

Today I’m heading to Tony Robbins conference.

With no hyperbole, this seminar is fifty-five hours. In four days. Here’s the breakdown.

  • Thursday: 1:00 p.m. – midnight
  • Friday: 8:30 a.m. – midnight
  • Saturday: 8:30 a.m. – 1 a.m.+
  • Sunday: 9:00 a.m. – 7:00 p.m.

You really have to commit to this bad boy. My boss was generous enough to pay for my admission and I’m pretty excited. I know a lot of people goof on Tony, but I’ve been a big fan since I was nineteen. I’ve read his books, listened to virtually every audio program, and now, finally attending a presentation.

If I had more wits about me I would have stayed at the hotel instead of driving forty-five minutes home each night. I have a dog and she needs to go out but I could have boarded her. So each night, geeked out on adrenaline and dopamine, I’ll be driving home. I’m not complaining. Friends who have been to this event have just told me it’s exhausting. I’ll try to live tweet as much as possible. I’m sure there will be plenty of humor to be found.

Why am I going? I’m looking for more balance in my life. I’ve noticed there’s a few areas where I need to step it up. First is my physical health. You’d think since I’m dating regularly I’d be in pristine shape, but I’m really not. Too much eating at restaurants and staying out late with dates. Also, I’m not writing as much as I have in the past. Last year was crazy as I wrote every day, but I’ve really been slacking. Lastly, and most importantly, for the man footing the bill, it’s time to take our business to the next level. We have a lot of irons in the fire currently and I need to keep driving revenue.

I know a lot of people would rather make fun of a “motivational” seminar than attend and I’ve never really understood that. I figure if I get just a few key ideas that can help balance and propel me forward then it’s worth it. And what if I meet a hot chick who’s really into self-improvement? That’s my stupid fantasy, just like when I get on an airplane – that somehow I’m going to be seated next to some goddess who loves a guy with a little Chihuahua and a narcissistic blog.

Oh, I’d like to add something. A Jehovah’s witness found my wallet yesterday. I was completely freaked out because it had fallen out of my dog backpack in the street of a busy intersection. A bus driver found it and phoned my insurance agent. When I called the guy (John) I praised him as my new savior and told him Jesus was now second fiddle to me. I didn’t know he was a religious man until I picked up the wallet from his bus stop. He had placed a copy of The Watchtower in a sack with my wallet. I gave him $50 as a reward.

Now, I’m not going to read it because I’m lazy and religions that don’t celebrate birthdays are out for me. But, if returning lost stuff is part of their deal, I gotta support that. So, from now on Jehovah’s Witness if the official religion of ThoughtsFromParis. Sorry Christianity. Wait – is it Christianity? I’m too lazy to Google.

Okay, off to the seminar. I’ll be live-tweeting everything awesome.

tony robbins family guy

13 thoughts on “Tony Robbins + D.J. Paris = Well, Something”

  1. Andrea says:

    Fifty-five hours of motivational speaking sounds way more exhausting than writing blog posts every day for a year, or maybe even Googling Christianity.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

      Ha! It was pretty exhausting. But fun. Also, I think I may have joined a cult. Save me!

  2. Lovelyn says:

    I’m jealous. I would love to go to a Tony Robbins conference. Will you be walking on hot coals? Have fun.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

      I did walk on hot coals! I wrote about it actually. I burned my feet a little because I was fucking around. Worth it.

  3. Tori says:

    Awesome post!

    PS: Jehovah means God.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

      Ha – thanks, Tori. I did know that, but it’s funnier to say Jehovah than God. Yaweh is also comedy gold, too.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

      I will check him out – thanks, Michelle!

  4. Lindsay says:

    Cute post. And awesome that your wallet was returned! Good to know there are good people out there!

    But sorry, Tori…Jehovah is at best a made up name for God. Really it’s a bad “translation” of the four letter name of God from the Torah. Some yahoo tried to pronounce it as though it was a word, and to make matters worse, other people who clearly knew squat about Hebrew put in a “J” which doesn’t even exist as a sound in the Hebrew language. Probably the same bunch who translated “young woman” as “virgin” in Isaiah! Ah, fun with faith! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jehovah

    1. Tori says:

      Hello there. I just wondered why my pastor/teacher who hosts all the religious meetings at school will teach us the wrong term.

      Not to sound like a total jerk, but that “sorry” in there sounded mocking. ALSO, Thank you for that precious information.

    2. D.J. Paris says:

      Hi Lindsay,

      All I know is that Jehovah is a funny term for God. It just produces the giggles.

  5. Jess says:

    You put a backpack on your Chihuahua? Isn’t he a little small for that? Or do you put your Chi in the backpack? What’s going on here?

    I often fantasize that I’ll get on the plane and be seated next to a God who has been searching for a crazy lady with 4 dogs and a inarcissistic blog.

    Pardon my spelling, sent from my itty bitty phone.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

      Yeah, I put the chihuahua in the backpack. She loves it!. Ooh, four dogs? Hmm… Uh…

      Yep, I’ll say it – you nuts. 🙂

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