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Comments on: Something Gross I Do https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/ Humor blogger D.J. Paris writes about the most interesting subject in the world - himself. It's worth a look if you're cool. And you are! Mon, 31 Mar 2014 03:22:17 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.8.3 By: Shawna https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-29351 Mon, 31 Mar 2014 03:22:17 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-29351 I got stuck on the “I have a cleaning lady” bit. The Craigslist petty thief?

Aside from the cancer tray of death, I must say (this comes from a middle-aged mom of adult children) I’m proud of your good habits. I tried grounding my daughter last week until she cleaned her room. Then her husband called to say he was fairly certain I couldn’t do that anymore, but heck, this was new territory so he backed me up. So she texted me a pic of her gorgeous bedroom, and for five seconds I felt victorious. Until I saw Eli-the-cat sleeping in the bay window. He died a year ago. Sorry I digressed. Great story you told!

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By: D.J. Paris https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-18353 Sun, 04 Aug 2013 04:59:50 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-18353 In reply to karen.

Thanks for reading!

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By: karen https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-18299 Fri, 02 Aug 2013 12:05:43 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-18299 Replacement trays are the way to go. You’ll never ha e to clean. Enjoying your posts…so witty!

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By: D.J. Paris https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-6674 Sun, 24 Jun 2012 21:55:02 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-6674 In reply to Laci Roth.

 @Laci Roth  Um, so where have you been lately?  Promoting your new line of clothing?  Spend more time reading my crap!

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By: D.J. Paris https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-6673 Sun, 24 Jun 2012 21:54:36 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-6673 In reply to Pish Posh.

 @Pish Posh  Agreed.  You’re way grosser.

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By: D.J. Paris https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-6672 Sun, 24 Jun 2012 21:54:23 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-6672 In reply to Laci Roth.

 @Laci Roth  Laci, we know each other too well.  Stop revealing hard truths about me.

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By: D.J. Paris https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-6671 Sun, 24 Jun 2012 21:54:01 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-6671 In reply to Jessica_thereader.

 @Jessica_thereader  What is this now?  You may need to show me (translation – do it for me whilst I watch television)

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By: D.J. Paris https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-6078 Wed, 23 May 2012 19:29:51 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-6078 In reply to Cindy Brown.

Do fireman read?  (oh yeah I did!)

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By: Cindy Brown https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-6077 Wed, 23 May 2012 16:24:23 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-6077 Don’t show this to the fire department. They might issue you a citation. It’s totally a fire hazard ;0)

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By: Jessica_thereader https://thoughtsfromparis.com/stories/something-gross-i-do/#comment-4486 Wed, 18 Jan 2012 05:08:09 +0000 http://delfinparis.com/newsite/?p=1696#comment-4486 Oven cleaner will take that right off.

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