I’m About To Do Something Gross

c_wang_md
I hope he didn't lose his license.

Yesterday I posted about how get extreme pleasure from those heavy dental aprons they put on you during x-rays.  I looked into buying one last night, but the really good ones are a few hundred dollars.

Did I really want to blow a few hundred bucks on a lead apron?  Seems like an expensive experiment.  I mean, I only have had that thing on me for three minutes at a time.  Maybe at minute four it starts to feel constricting and scary.  Who knows?

So, I took my search to Ebay.

More of the same, really.  Expensive aprons, and shipping is a killer.

Until I found IT.

dental xray apron vest
I look AWESOME in green.

Let’s zoom in a bit, shall we?

used with stains
Um...

Not “a stain”, but “some staining”?  That’s more than one stain.  Good that there’s no rips, I guess.

c_wang_md
Why the cursive?

Oh man, do I have some questions for C. Wang, M.D.  What’s the C. stand for?  Did you go bankrupt?  And, if so, I’m guessing it’s because you didn’t wash your lead aprons.

I have another, more interesting thought – Dr. Wang loves boobs.  He decided to become a radiologist, and my theory is that he got in so he could look at cans all day.  As a result, he started doing breast exams that lasted a little too long.  Plus, he would grin the entire time.  He was brought up on charges, sent to jail, and shivved in the shower by a large Mexican.

And now I’m going to buy his nasty old vest.  But I have a few questions, which I sent over to the seller.

  • What is the heaviness of the vest?  I want to make sure it’s no pussy 5lb’er.  I need a heavy vest.
  • What kind of stains?
As soon as I hear back, as long as the words “semen”  or “boob milk” do not appear, it’s going to be shipped to me at work.  Not sure how I’ll explain it to my coworkers.
Will keep you posted.

6 thoughts on “I’m About To Do Something Gross”

  1. bunjee333 says:

    There is a whole market for weighted blankets for people with SPD. Not sure how they compare to the lead aprons from the dentist, but most of them I’ve seen are considerably cheaper than a new vest.
     
    Though it’s kind of difficult to beat the possible stories behind Dr. Wang’s mystery stained offering.   That’s kind of priceless.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

       @bunjee333   I have to get the stained vest.  It’s calling me like a siren.

  2. circustoybox says:

    are you sure it isn’t “Wong”?

    1. D.J. Paris says:

       @circustoybox  Don’t ruin my joke.  Yes, it’s probably “Wong” but “Wang” is way funnier.

    1. D.J. Paris says:

       @Pediatric Dentist  I’m just glad a member of the medical profession reads this blog.  Even if it is a dentist.

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