I Wear the Same Shirt on Every First Date

shirt I wear on dates
Yes, I know - time to take it to the dry cleaner. It's earned it.

I miss writing.

For the past month I’ve taken time off and haven’t made the blog a priority. It’s a bummer because I miss my regular commenters. I also miss sharing my daily life. Quite frankly, outside of doing a lot of dating, not a whole lot has happened to mention. But not much happened last year and I still managed to write every day without a miss.

I’ve been putting a lot of energy into the podcast and new videocast and people seem to dig it. But this blog is my true passion. With that being said…

Let’s talk about wearing the same shirts on dates with different people.

I have determined that a uniform is necessary for the well-being of my dating.

If you’re going on a few dates a week then, I’ve learned, you have to always wear the same shirt the first time. Because you’re going to forget what you wore with who. Now, I’m not out galavanting with every young lovely I come across. But even with just a couple of dates now and then, you aren’t going to remember that you put on that silver dickie with Barbara last Tuesday.

Now, what if you wore the same outfit by accident to the same date twice in a row? Who cares, right? Not me – I don’t give a shit. But women do. I know this because I’ve asked a bunch of them. I’m not exactly sure what the big deal is, but they notice. I can’t tell you what any person I’ve taken out has worn. I hardly notice. I wish I did as my mom’s business  is high-end women’s fashion clothing, and you think I’d be more tuned in, but I’m just not. This is embarrassing and try not to judge, but I can’t tell you anyone in my life’s eye color. I know I’m sort of blue. Couldn’t tell you my family, friends, or any girlfriend’s peepers.

On the positive side, I also don’t notice if you gain weight. I once had a girlfriend who put on like fifteen pounds for some reason. I think she was stressed about work or something. It never even occurred to me to pay attention to her expanding waistline. She was still as beautiful to me as ever.

The downside is that I don’t notice when you lose weight either.

So, I need to work on being more present for external factors like dress and appearance. I am very aware for internal stuff that you’re experiencing. Thanks to a shitload of therapy I’ve learned how to develop intimacy through paying attention to your feelings and junk. I’m present for you, baby! Now, let me turn on the Playstation and zone out while you do something that women do when their husbands are playing video games.

If you’re going to date me you’re going to have to love my purple striped shirt. Don’t worry, it looks nice. Yes, it’s been in front of other women who I was trying to impress. Yes I once spilled Ethiopian chicken all down the front. And yes, once it even came off in a heavy makeout session with a lawyer. And no, I didn’t see her “briefs.” Sorry, worst joke EVER.

Now I need to come up with universal second date shirt. Maybe the brown one.

shirt I wear on dates
Yes, I know – time to take it to the dry cleaner. It’s earned it.

19 thoughts on “I Wear the Same Shirt on Every First Date”

  1. jodi(aka daizie_825) says:

    It just goes to show you look for something “deeper” in a person. I, and I may be alone I would assume, that its a commendable trait. Sure its great when another notices something new or different but that isnt what the balance of the relationship is, or should be. Plus when, say you do notice, its more of a compliment or taken note, as its not as often. Trick there? Add it to conversation now and again.

  2. Quirky Chrissy says:

    Dude. This is amazing. I wish I had thought to wear the same outfit on first dates when I was a serial dater. It would have eliminated like an hour of prepping, trying on a bazillion different outfits. Brilliant, Paris. Brilliant.

  3. Angelique says:

    You lost me at dickie…smh do people even still wear those? Maybe I am just totally out of it fashion-wise. Although, if you’re dating it makes sense I guess to wear the same thing the first date but do you also decide that the second date is jean shorts and a tank top on a regular basis…omg! I am a redneck!!!

  4. Jess says:

    As a woman I’m ashamed that 1) I have no idea if I wore what I’m wearing yesterday. 2) Nor will I notice what you’re wearing, what color your eyes and hair are or how fat or skinny you get. But I will notice if you don’t feel good physically or emotionally.

    Wait… wait… am I a man? No wonder I’m single.

  5. Toby Neal says:

    Ha ha! You may say you don’t follow fashion too closely…but you know what a “dickie” is, something no dude really ought to.
    I thought the shirt was because you got “lucky” in it. Your real reason made me snort coffee. So thanks for that.
    Your triberrmate & fellow writer (but my dating days are over)
    Toby Neal

  6. Shirley Maya Tan says:

    Now, this is a clear sign of someone who’s covering all his bases. You are prepared from the very first date! LOL

  7. wendy says:

    You remind me of my husband. LOL.

  8. Wendy says:

    Women notice if a shirt’s been ironed 🙂 A crisp clean smooth shirt bodes well for the future.

  9. Kaci says:

    If you’ve been dating a while and only just now need to come up with a second date shirt….maybe you should rethink the first shirt! ;););)

  10. Stephanie Force says:

    Hey, as long as your shoes match your belt and your pants to your socks, we’re all good.

    Just kidding, as long as your personality shines though it shouldn’t matter what you wear.

  11. Emily says:

    I totally agree with your shirt-system of dating…I am always paranoid when I go out with my girlfriends who I haven’t seen in a while that I’m wearing the same outfit that I wore with them last time (note: girls dress to impress girls). In fact, to cover my ass (not my literal ass but my figurative ass), I always joke to them, “did I wear this outfit the last time we went out?” Even if I did, they always say “no” to spare me the embarrassment.

  12. Lady Unemployed says:

    I’m not sure I could wear the same outfit on my first dates. I think it would get to me after a while. 🙂

  13. Kristina says:

    This is such a great idea — you know you won’t wear the same thing twice in a row, AND, you don’t have to spend any time thinking about what to wear. If I ever decide to try dating again, I am absolutely going to pick out first and second -date outfits, at a minimum. Brilliant.

  14. Sarah says:

    I can’t decide if this is genius or really bizarre, so I’m going to go with genius.

  15. Kate Hall says:

    Dang, what’d you do in that shirt? Wrinkly. I’m guessing it was balled up in a corner of your bedroom. I can’t stop laughing, picturing you wearing that shirt, as-is, on a date. Tears are coming.

  16. Mod Mom Beyond IndieDom says:

    If you’re wearing a silver dickie my friend, you’re not going out with Barbara; you’re going out with Bob.
    I know you don’t own a silver dickie though, right?

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